Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Celebration?

I don't believe in setting aside one day to celebrate womanhood. Yet if slowly that one day spreads its clutches to the rest of the year then I am game.

I refused to cook yesterday coz I didn't feel like it. The Mr immediately took over the job. I didn't have to ask, I didn't have to fake a headache and we didn't order out. And it felt nice being treated like that. By a man. So to day I want to celebrate the women who didn't/don't have that privilege.

  • My 78 year old Grandma. For raising 8 kids, of which 7 were daughters, all by herself (Grandpa was away in Calcutta or Ceylon for work). For giving them the strength they needed to go through their lives with pride and stand up for themselves when they needed to and for teaching them that being submissive doesn't mean you give up your right to enjoy life.
  • My 6 aunts. Each blessed with a life that could have been better but each making the best of whatever was given to them and raising their kids with more freedom than what they were given.
  • Amma. It's a miracle that she gets up everyday before us and wakes us up with hot coffee. Her joints ache, her legs are permanently swollen. She can't hold vessels coz most days she doesn't feel her fingers at all. The doctors wonder how she is moving about considering her condition, which for all their great studies they can't figure out. She doesn't realise she has burnt her hand or cut herself until i point the scar to her. And not a single day was I asked to eat outside. Irrespective of whether she suffered from fever or cold shivers, she was out of the bed EVERY single day to make sure we had our 3 meals. And that they weren't left overs. Through all this, not once did I see her wince in pain. Her suffering is her own. For raising me to be a strong willed woman, teaching me the nuances between compromise and cowardice, telling me I am worth milions and to wlak out of any place that doesn't treat me that way. And for teaching me to smile, even if i felt like crying inside. For that smile, I would do anything.

I celebrate these women everyday. The men in our lives feel they are angels too but having grown up in a male-dominant society, they never voice it out. If such a day gives them an excuse to be all mushy and tell them they are wonderful, then so be it.

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.
~Oscar Wilde

To all the prize-winning works of art around the world, Happy Women's Day!

9 Comments:

Blogger Jinguchakka said...

In what way is this one day different that you want it to spread its clutches to the rest of the year? This day too waould have seeen its share of suffering by women the world over. Would the rapists and the mcps of the world cease their work for this day? Ritual doesn't mean a thing. If it's decided that this day something tangible is done which is not carried over to the rest of the year, then it's the day. Otherwise it's no different.
And I salute those you have eulogised and in awe about. Your mom, aunts. Every generation of women is better off than the ones preceding it.

12:53 PM  
Blogger Kumari said...

@jinguchakka: No they won't. All men are not rapists or MCPs.But all men don't recognise/respect the women in their lives. They are just taken for granted. To me at the moment, a tangible solution is a far-fetched dream. Let's start by recognising them ATLEAST on this day. And maybe over years, after some repeated drilling and many miraculous social upheavels, the rest would follow. And soon, however utopian it sounds to me today, we might have a world where we don't need 'Mother's day' and "women's day' to make a point. We celebrate not just womanhood but humanity as a whole.

See, every generation of women tries to mould herself with the changing times and come out on tops. Men do too, just they're a tad bit slower and lesser in number :)

I don't know if i answered your query. My 2 cents, that's all.

4:25 PM  
Blogger Me said...

Women's day.. some how these destined days of celebrations dont hold any value. But like u said ATLEAST today!!!

If this world were ruled by women, there would be fewer senseless deaths and lesser violence.

10:18 PM  
Blogger Kumari said...

@Me: Aah...that's a generalization we can do without. Trust me, for every bad King, there's an equally bad if not worse Queen.[Thou art shall Google. Me lazy:p] Power corrupts every mind and Absolute Power is like an aphrodisiac :) So it doesn't matter which chromosome pair rules.

But yeah I would still like to believe that we would be less violent :)

11:01 PM  
Blogger RT said...

I hadnt mentioned a thing and did not even know that it was womens day until I got a rose at work for Womens day. But in the evening, Mr tricked me into a nice dinner (so what if the good restaurants were packed and we ended up eating at pizza hut) under the pretext of going for some bank related work.
Our mums and grandmums never enjoyed this kinda freedom. Maybe they did have their moments of such affection from their men but in a different genre, in a different light. Maybe thats what kept them going, slogging day and night looking after us and them.
Very nicely put.

2:00 AM  
Blogger Swathi said...

in ur characteristic style, Women's Day cudnt have been better worded -watz the best thing i liked was the hope n smile it brings to my lips...

7:03 AM  
Blogger M (tread softly upon) said...

Here's to all the moms and aunts and grandmas....we are what we are because of them and what they chose to give up. Another brilliant post kumari.

9:41 AM  
Blogger Primalsoup said...

Thank you, thank you. Am glad someone seems to think I am a work of art!
But the amount that the day has got marketed is mind boggling. Somewhere unlike the Anti V-Day debate, this becomes easier to accept somehow. I wonder if the men feel that way! :)

10:36 AM  
Blogger Kumari said...

@RT: You are on elucky woman, i must say :D Thanks :)

@Swathi: You are too sweet :)Btw, when is the next Brussells instalment?

@M(TSU): Oh yeah, 3 cheers to the previous generations. Thanks a lot :)

@Soups:Aww, now you are indeed a work of art :) You know, we should change International Women's day to Men's day coz if there is indeed a change required, it is in their mindsets. So maybe again pandering to their ego would help them see the best way for both the genders, and they can actually 'think' it was "their idea" all along :D *pats on back*

9:42 PM  

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